Counselling Together.

Its been a week since my first counselling session. And I am heading back to Hope House, but this time I am not alone. Shell is with me.

She does not want to see a counsellor by herself. So we are going for couples counselling. I don't know if it to do with the safety blanket of having me there or the unknown entity of counselling.

Shell is nervously playing with her phone as we sign into the building. We are met by Suzanne, we get settled in the room. Suzanne start off gently, maybe as she could sense Shells apprehension.

I sit back from the conversation, as Shell talks about Kim and the family. It was nothing heavy, as she is not one for sharing emotions freely. Then it came around to Kim's illness.

Shell was not opening up, I don't know why. She talked about how much she missed her, how she had been the talking to her a lot on the phone, but did not talk about why she had a problem with going to see her.

I am sitting there thinking that the main nut to crack for Shell to get the most out of it, is for Shell to under stand the protective barrier of not having to look at the physical signs of the leukemia and the treatment in Kim. This would lead to exploring the problem of her not going out.

I can understand why in the time just after Kim's death, that Shell would not fancy going out. I had a fair deal of it at work, People reminding you. Now it not really their fault, they want to show you they care. But after a while the lines, ' I'm sorry for your loss' and 'my condolences' become sticks poking at the scar left on the heart.

The session comes to an end for today. It seemed that Shell was a bit happier about counselling. Doing it alone, was still beyond her at the moment. That's ok, I can live with that she taken the first steps. This is the largest distances, she been from the house since losing Kim. And she is getting help from a counsellor.

So It's been a big day for her, I am glad that she was able to come this far. Let hope the forward movement carry on.