The pavement fills with people to watch the coffin being loaded, me and Shell headed for the car. The vicar joined us in the car for the trip to the grave. With the back door of the hearse closing. The chief undertaker walk past the front of the car carrying a High visibility waistcoat.
As he puts it on my dark humour kicked in, I chuckled and before I could stop myself I said “A undertaker wearing a hi vis what next safety barriers around the grave” the vicar is the only one to react to this with a smile, I don't know if he like it or was being polite.
The cars set off for the half mile to the cemetery. When we arrive, there are 3 car by the grave. The hearse, our mourners car and my parents as my Mum has trouble walking due to her MS*. There is a pause to allow the people coming from the church on foot to arrive. So I check to see how mum is getting on with the uneven ground.
The crowd watches as Kim's coffin slides slowly and smoothly along the walnut deck onto the carrier. Reflecting on the polish black paintwork of the hearse as it passed heading toward it final resting place.
Accompanied by the quiet sound of sobbing, the coffin arrives next to the hole waiting for it. I look around to see groups of people huddled together comforting each other, the colour they wear does not matching the mood.
Kim is moved over the hole and is slowly lowered into the deep void, down into the cold darkness of her final resting place as the vicar say the poignant words “earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust”
mourners start to shuffle past the grave to pay they final respects, Stuart starts to shuffle past then slips almost sliding into the open grave. A few laughs sound out across the graveyard as Stuart is helped back to his feet.
The hearse moves off, the sun reflecting off the polished paintwork, sliver metal work and empty walnut load deck. Where Kim once lay for her final journey.
*Multiple Sclerosis.
The Funeral - Part 2
We have to walk past the hearse to get to the mourners car. As we get closer, Shell hand gets tighter on mine. We get into the car and the convoy moves off with the chief undertaker walking in front. there was a lot of people standing at their gates, with sad looks and bowing heads.
As we drew up at church I can see a sea of Red, Red shirts, Red T shirts, Liverpool tops and scarves. It was a wonderful, breath taking sight. I watch as Kim is being taken out of the hearse. Everyone heads into the church. We line up behind her at the door as we do I see Kim's Biological Father (KBF) sporting the grey Liverpool away shirt. He has to be different.
With all the chief mourners ready, The well Known song, you will never walk alone played by Gerry and the Pacemakers starts to play. I take a big gulp to try and clear the big lump that just appeared in my throat. I feel Shell squeeze my hand, we look at each other. And start to follow the coffin in.
As we walk down the aisle with Kim coffin covered in a Liverpool FC flag, I realize the church is packed with a sea of red, so pack in fact, over half the mourners do not have seats. So many people and so many lives touched by hers.
We file into our seats at the front. A Solitary coffin, Kim's coffin stands isolated and alone, in the middle of the large deserted space at the front of the church. The vicar starts the service, and for some strange reason when the first hymn, all things bright and beautiful, started I felt a little disconnected from the service it self. Lost in my own world thinking of Kim as some people behind me sing alternative lyrics to the hymn.
The eulogy is lovely, going on about how caring Kim was. Her attitude over not letting her deafness get in the way of her life, the awards she got for her attitude over it.
At this point I am holding back the tears with a big lump in my throat, It was so bad I could not sing along to Give me joy in my heart.
The Hymn finished and it was time for the chief mourners to line up to follow Kim out, KBF was looking related with his wife standing beside him, I could hear tuts from a couple of people. His wife moves a bit to show KBF leaning on the coffin.
We all get into position and Celine Dion My heart will go on, the theme tune of Kim favour film titanic start playing. We follow the coffin out, followed by the sea of red.
As we drew up at church I can see a sea of Red, Red shirts, Red T shirts, Liverpool tops and scarves. It was a wonderful, breath taking sight. I watch as Kim is being taken out of the hearse. Everyone heads into the church. We line up behind her at the door as we do I see Kim's Biological Father (KBF) sporting the grey Liverpool away shirt. He has to be different.
With all the chief mourners ready, The well Known song, you will never walk alone played by Gerry and the Pacemakers starts to play. I take a big gulp to try and clear the big lump that just appeared in my throat. I feel Shell squeeze my hand, we look at each other. And start to follow the coffin in.
As we walk down the aisle with Kim coffin covered in a Liverpool FC flag, I realize the church is packed with a sea of red, so pack in fact, over half the mourners do not have seats. So many people and so many lives touched by hers.
We file into our seats at the front. A Solitary coffin, Kim's coffin stands isolated and alone, in the middle of the large deserted space at the front of the church. The vicar starts the service, and for some strange reason when the first hymn, all things bright and beautiful, started I felt a little disconnected from the service it self. Lost in my own world thinking of Kim as some people behind me sing alternative lyrics to the hymn.
The eulogy is lovely, going on about how caring Kim was. Her attitude over not letting her deafness get in the way of her life, the awards she got for her attitude over it.
At this point I am holding back the tears with a big lump in my throat, It was so bad I could not sing along to Give me joy in my heart.
The Hymn finished and it was time for the chief mourners to line up to follow Kim out, KBF was looking related with his wife standing beside him, I could hear tuts from a couple of people. His wife moves a bit to show KBF leaning on the coffin.
We all get into position and Celine Dion My heart will go on, the theme tune of Kim favour film titanic start playing. We follow the coffin out, followed by the sea of red.
The Funeral - Part 1
I am feeling a bit down to today, its understandable as it is the funeral today. There is no time to sit and mope. There is stuff to do, logistical bits, getting the CD in a place where we wont forget it. Clothes ready to wear. Get food, Something, anything as I don't really feel like it, but going down due to lack of eating is not good.
At the moment I am in Spock mode, Just doing stuff as it is logical and holding back the emotion of the day so I can function. I get to the time in the day where I Take the landrover up to the woodland pub where we are holding the wake, we are having a funeral car so I don't have to support Shell and drive at the same time.
As I walk back home I start to think about the day ahead. I am dreading the funeral, It is horrible to bury your kids. I cant even conceive what it is like for shell to do this, and not being rude, I don't want to try, I am finding it hard to keep myself together, without pushing deeper into my feelings.
I get home and head off upstairs to get changed, I have decided to wear a suit, but I don't have a red shirt so a salmon coloured shirt will have to do. I head down stairs as it nearly time for the transport to arrive.
Shell stands next to me at the door, I can see her eye are moist. Stuart shout “here She come” Shell gets hold of my hand, in silence. The hearse comes into view, as the black paintwork reflects in the light, and the glass side showing the coffin of Kim, Shell tightens her grip.
The front door closes with a dull thud and clunk of the lock, I look at shell and see the despair and sadness in her eyes.
At the moment I am in Spock mode, Just doing stuff as it is logical and holding back the emotion of the day so I can function. I get to the time in the day where I Take the landrover up to the woodland pub where we are holding the wake, we are having a funeral car so I don't have to support Shell and drive at the same time.
As I walk back home I start to think about the day ahead. I am dreading the funeral, It is horrible to bury your kids. I cant even conceive what it is like for shell to do this, and not being rude, I don't want to try, I am finding it hard to keep myself together, without pushing deeper into my feelings.
I get home and head off upstairs to get changed, I have decided to wear a suit, but I don't have a red shirt so a salmon coloured shirt will have to do. I head down stairs as it nearly time for the transport to arrive.
Shell stands next to me at the door, I can see her eye are moist. Stuart shout “here She come” Shell gets hold of my hand, in silence. The hearse comes into view, as the black paintwork reflects in the light, and the glass side showing the coffin of Kim, Shell tightens her grip.
The front door closes with a dull thud and clunk of the lock, I look at shell and see the despair and sadness in her eyes.
Black or Red? That is the Question
The Vicar had just left. We decided to get the him to do the eulogy, As me and shell thought we could not stand up and talk about Kim without breaking down. I have to find two CD with the songs we want playing at the entrance and exit of Kim. I am thinking of making a CD with just the two songs in the order they are going to be played, to save any problems on the day.
Pat has decided to deal with the head stone and has told us bluntly she buying it, end of. I think it nice that she doing it, and I am not arguing with her. As I don't want to upset her, she had enough of that already.
I think back over the last few days. Some people thought it was wrong of me not to go see Kim in the chapel of rest. But I said my goodbyes at the hospital. I did not need to see her again, to cry again.
There had been a big chat about clothing for the funeral. Formal Black? Come as you are? Suits? During the chat my dark humour raised its head, and I had to stop myself from saying nudist. Some time I come very close to my humour getting me into trouble. It all came back to the same question every time a dress code was suggested “What would Kim want?”
So that where we started, Formal black? No, suits? No, Come as you are? Crop top and peddle pusher, Defiantly NO. Smart Casual? Yes, but not black, Bright colours. Some suggested Red. Then that was link to her favour football club, Liverpool.
That was it Dress code is Smart casual, Liverpool shirts or red tops.
We told all that were coming and One of Kim's best mates Katie, contact us. Asking if she has to wear a liverpool top as she is a strong Man U fan. This is the same Katie that Kim had an in joke with over the two teams, so I commented that Kim would of found it funny for her to turn up in a Man U Shirt, as the final in joke between them. Only time with tell if she does or not.
Pat has decided to deal with the head stone and has told us bluntly she buying it, end of. I think it nice that she doing it, and I am not arguing with her. As I don't want to upset her, she had enough of that already.
I think back over the last few days. Some people thought it was wrong of me not to go see Kim in the chapel of rest. But I said my goodbyes at the hospital. I did not need to see her again, to cry again.
There had been a big chat about clothing for the funeral. Formal Black? Come as you are? Suits? During the chat my dark humour raised its head, and I had to stop myself from saying nudist. Some time I come very close to my humour getting me into trouble. It all came back to the same question every time a dress code was suggested “What would Kim want?”
So that where we started, Formal black? No, suits? No, Come as you are? Crop top and peddle pusher, Defiantly NO. Smart Casual? Yes, but not black, Bright colours. Some suggested Red. Then that was link to her favour football club, Liverpool.
That was it Dress code is Smart casual, Liverpool shirts or red tops.
We told all that were coming and One of Kim's best mates Katie, contact us. Asking if she has to wear a liverpool top as she is a strong Man U fan. This is the same Katie that Kim had an in joke with over the two teams, so I commented that Kim would of found it funny for her to turn up in a Man U Shirt, as the final in joke between them. Only time with tell if she does or not.
News Hounds
I am Sitting in the front room looking at the cordless phone, Wondering how the person that just phoned got our ex directory number.
I could understand local interest, But national interest baffled me. I think I better start a the beginning.
I woke up to hear shell telling someone to go away, in less polite terms then closed front door, I find out a few minutes later It was a lad I know from the local weekly newspaper, The Advertiser. Who popped around to find out if I knew anything about the rumour of a death of a college student.
Later on in the day, I given him a ring. And arranged a time for him to pop round for a chat. Between that call and him arriving later in the day, Pat had three calls and we had one from newspapers, asking for interview.
We had decided that only, the Advertiser and Shropshire Star would get anything out of us. As they are local papers. David Lawson of the Advertiser turns up as arranged on the phone. We all sit down in the front room to chat.
David is same age as me, we were in the same year at school. But he was more sporty than me, and was not one of the geeky weirdos that I was. And some say I still am.
Talking about the tilt I would like on the article, That was the message of Give Blood. And why I wanted it to be in the article. Kim had had so many blood products in hospital to try and save her, None of this would have been possible without ordinary people doing some thing as simple but amazing as giving blood. Most of what was said is already here on the blog so I wont bore you with it.
Shell says “You feel so helpless and just wish it was happening to you instead” I was pondering this, and the parents need to protect they children. When Shell starts chatting about Kim hiding how tough the treatment was and rarely showing it, and how she chatted to others starting out on treatment on the ward. I thought of jumping in and saying, I think the rare time she showed how hard it is was when I arrived.
You see Kim thinks about other people feelings, and try to protect them. She knew with me she could let the guard down, after all I was the straight talking First aider?
After we finished chatting, We say goodbye to the 6ft 3 reporter left.
Then the phone ring, Its a woman magazine, wanting to buy Kims story. Over the next couple of weeks, Phone calls, letters, all wanting one thing The exclusive rights to Our, Kims story.
To think about making money at a time like this for the story would be loathsome, crude and would Sully Kim memory. But that did not stop them from ringing time and time again.
I could understand local interest, But national interest baffled me. I think I better start a the beginning.
I woke up to hear shell telling someone to go away, in less polite terms then closed front door, I find out a few minutes later It was a lad I know from the local weekly newspaper, The Advertiser. Who popped around to find out if I knew anything about the rumour of a death of a college student.
Later on in the day, I given him a ring. And arranged a time for him to pop round for a chat. Between that call and him arriving later in the day, Pat had three calls and we had one from newspapers, asking for interview.
We had decided that only, the Advertiser and Shropshire Star would get anything out of us. As they are local papers. David Lawson of the Advertiser turns up as arranged on the phone. We all sit down in the front room to chat.
David is same age as me, we were in the same year at school. But he was more sporty than me, and was not one of the geeky weirdos that I was. And some say I still am.
Talking about the tilt I would like on the article, That was the message of Give Blood. And why I wanted it to be in the article. Kim had had so many blood products in hospital to try and save her, None of this would have been possible without ordinary people doing some thing as simple but amazing as giving blood. Most of what was said is already here on the blog so I wont bore you with it.
Shell says “You feel so helpless and just wish it was happening to you instead” I was pondering this, and the parents need to protect they children. When Shell starts chatting about Kim hiding how tough the treatment was and rarely showing it, and how she chatted to others starting out on treatment on the ward. I thought of jumping in and saying, I think the rare time she showed how hard it is was when I arrived.
You see Kim thinks about other people feelings, and try to protect them. She knew with me she could let the guard down, after all I was the straight talking First aider?
After we finished chatting, We say goodbye to the 6ft 3 reporter left.
Then the phone ring, Its a woman magazine, wanting to buy Kims story. Over the next couple of weeks, Phone calls, letters, all wanting one thing The exclusive rights to Our, Kims story.
To think about making money at a time like this for the story would be loathsome, crude and would Sully Kim memory. But that did not stop them from ringing time and time again.
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