beard or spiritual plaster?

I have done something that shell does not like, grown a beard.

Now I don't really know why I have grown it, may be due to not having Kim lip reading any more, maybe something to hide behind or just as a Spiritual plaster.

All I know is I feel a bit more comfortable with it on. I don't think its really to hide behind, as you stand out with a beard. But then again it hard to see if the mouth is a bit smiley or a bit sad with a beard.

Many blokes say they feel more confident or like a new man, when they have a beard. As for me it is part of the defence I use to stay upright and working. It is a bit weird, some want to hide. But I want to go Its not me, I'm different, I am in distress. I am Supporting a Family in distress.

I would be an idiot not to recognise the family is in distress. I am trying to hold it together, work and do my volunteering. How the hell are you meant to get your head straight, working 12 hour days. Have a step daughter that wont talk, but will go to her mates and come back drunk as her way of coping. A step lad that was already messed up in the emotion department before Kim got ill. Having a Daughter with Globe development delay, newly diagnosed ADHD that does not have the language skill to express her feelings.

Then there is the Big one, My wife, Shell.

A Mother that has lost her First born.A woman that has had her heart ripped out and jumped up and down on by Gods big size 15 hobnail boots.

You would be forgiven for thinking I am going to tell you about how my wife and her world imploded, But I think the least she deserve a future posting I am trying to write. That show her problems for what they are and not as she said “ I am worried the blog will make me look like a completely mad bitch”