Shell is having problems coping with the stress of what has happened. This is coming out in the form of panic attacks.
These don't really affect her when she is in the familiar controlled environment of home, or Pats, her mums house that is within sight of our home. But when she is out of the house, she starts getting a bit wound up. Ending up with her having palpitations, sweating, dizziness and light headedness.
At this point she gets into the fight or flight response. Shell is quite feisty at times making her flight almost like a fight at times. Getting really agitated and angry when heading away from home. Starting to settle down when heading back to her comfort zone.
This make her going shopping a nightmare. So I do it, usually at 9pm on Tuesday night after my first aid group's training night, or after work for the Freezer shop. Even though I do the shopping shell make a list for me to follow, but I do make a few changes to cheaper items.
I know It sounds like there is a bit of agoraphobia mix in there too.
She tries to hides from her grief and feeling of lost by keeping the house running. And doing all the things a mother does at home. When she stops doing that, the computer become her comfort blanket. Just like it was the life line between her and Kim when she was in hospital.
It is understandable that Shell is finding it hard to cope, a mother bond to her children is strong. As I said in my last posting she is 'A woman that has had her heart ripped out and jumped up and down on by Gods big size 15 hobnail boots.'
She needs love, support, understanding and a hand in the right direction. For me to be her rock, For me to need her, to show her that even if she not doing stuff out side the house, that she is still useful and needed. For us to support each other, in our own individual ways.
To be a loving couple battling though what life has thrown at us, together.
No comments:
Post a Comment